That HMS article is wild. As someone with moderate hearing loss and raging tinnitus, this would be a dream come true if it ever happens.

3 football pitches*. If it were in yards, then it would be fields.

“We’ve investigated ourselves and found that we did nothing wrong.”

I only put brown mustard on hotdogs, so I think at that point I would just eat a hot dog on a bun covered in Mac and cheese.

I loathe ketchup with every fiber of my being. Other people can use it however they want, but it truly ruins food for me.

Nothing, because if someone puts ketchup on my pizza, it’s going straight in the trash.